How to Enjoy Being Single: Simple Guide to Self-Discovery, Self-Care, and Freedom

Being single is not a problem. It is a season to learn, grow, and smile. You can use this time to know yourself better, take good care of your body and mind, and build strong friendships. Many studies show that single people can be healthy and happy when they live with purpose and stay connected to others. 

Below is a simple, step-by-step guide—using your four points—to help you enjoy being single every day.

1) Embrace Self-Discovery and Growth

Get to know yourself

Ask yourself: What do I value? What work or study makes me excited? What kind of life do I want in five years?
Write your answers in a small notebook or in Google Keep. Try a weekly “check-in” on Sunday evening. Add three lines: What I learned, What I enjoyed, and What I will try next week.

Pursue personal goals

Pick one goal for your education, one for health, and one for money. Make each goal small and clear:

• “Study Java 30 minutes daily.”
• “Walk 6,000–8,000 steps each day.”

• “Save $ 1,000 every week.”
• Break big goals into tiny steps so you can win often and stay motivated. When you reach a step, celebrate (even a small “good job” to yourself). This builds confidence and keeps you moving forward.

Try new things

New hobbies help you discover hidden talents and bring joy. Test one new activity each month:

• Join a coding club at University or college.
• Try a basic cooking class (ugali and veggie sides with less oil).
• Learn photography on your phone and shoot sunrise over Mount Kigali.

• Volunteer on Umuganda(community work); helping others grows your skills and your heart.
• Trying new things also grows creativity and independence values many single people say matter for their happiness. 

2) Prioritize Self-Care and Well-Being

Practice self-care rituals

Self-care is not selfish; it keeps you strong. Build simple daily habits:

• Move your body: a 20–30 minute walk in the evening (roads, sports hub paths, or around the neighborhood). Walking with a friend also boosts mood and health.
• Eat simple, colorful meals: beans, greens ( with less salt), sweet potatoes, fruits when you can.
• Sleep at regular times: a quiet, dark room helps your brain rest and your feelings stay steady.

Treat yourself (in smart ways)

Plan small joys each week: tea at a local café, a solo movie night, or a mini “spa” at home with music and a warm bath. Keep it within your budget so you feel calm, not stressed.

Strengthen your friendships

Friends are powerful for health and happiness. Make a habit to message or call two people each week. Plan low-cost meetups: walk together, cook together, or study together. Strong relationships protect long-term health and happiness—even more than money or fame, according to decades of Harvard research.
If you feel lonely, that is normal sometimes. Reach out. Staying socially active helps your mood, thinking, and overall health.

Be kind to yourself (self-compassion)

Talk to yourself like you would talk to a good friend. When you make a mistake, say: “I’m learning. It’s okay.”
This kind, calm voice lowers stress and helps you grow. Researchers show self-compassion supports better mental health and steady well-being.

3) Enjoy Your Freedom and Independence

Date yourself

Yes, really. Plan a “solo date” each week:

• Breakfast at your favorite spot in different places you like.
• Sunset view at mountain or a quiet reading hour at home.
• A museum visit or art market stroll.
• Bring a small gift for yourself—like a flower, a bookmark, or a new wallpaper for your phone. This teaches your brain, “I am worth time, care, and beauty.”

Travel and explore

You don’t need a big budget to explore. Try micro-adventures:

• A Saturday visit to Women’s Center.
• A day trip with a friend to Lake.
• A hike on Mount Kigali or a nature walk near Huye.
• If you travel alone, share your plan with a friend, keep your phone charged, and use trusted transport.Exploring builds confidence and happy memories.

Find joy in your own company

Start small: enjoy 10 minutes of quiet each day—no phone, just breathing or gentle music. Many people learn that time alone can be calm and creative, not scary. When you use solitude well, you can feel fresh and strong

4) Reframe Your Perspective

Focus on the positives

Make a quick list called “Why this season is good.” Examples:

• I can choose my schedule.
• I can study and build my skills.
• I can save money for my goals.
• I can serve my community.
• Keep this list on your wall or as your phone note. Read it when you feel down. Many single adults live healthy, connected, happy lives—there are many paths to a good life

Don’t compare yourself

Everyone’s timeline is different. Your friend may be engaged; you may be finishing a degree or building a startup.
Both paths can be great. Reduce social media time if it makes you compare too much. Use that time to practice a skill or call a friend.

Seek support when needed

Feeling lonely or stuck? Talk to a trusted friend, a mentor, a church or youth leader, or a counselor. Connection helps.
Long-term loneliness can harm health, so it’s brave and smart to ask for help early. 

Singlehood is not an empty space. It is a full, living chapter where you can know yourself, care for your health, enjoy your freedom, and see life with fresh eyes. Keep your four pillars strong: self-discovery, self-care, independence, and a healthy perspective. Stay active, stay kind to yourself, and stay connected to people who lift you up. With small, steady steps—right here in Rwanda—you can truly enjoy being single and build a life you’re proud of.